There Aren’t Enough Clown Names

Just who are these people? I have spent a couple of weeks trying to discern the answer to this question. I’m sorry to say that even with what I consider judicious scrutiny, the “people’ who are running are government are seriously lacking in almost every way. We are led by a pack of freaks, and if they were sitting next to you on a park bench ( not that they would because none of them would willingly get that close to you unless you’re a lobbyist or prostitute, or both) you would quickly get up, check your wallet, and then douse yourself with hand sanitizer.

I find myself seriously wondering what the heck is going on. How did any of these weirdos get elected to what should be a very serious undertaking? It’s like being in the elevator with a dude that has really bad hairplugs. You’re thinking, ” Does homie have a mirror at home? How could he not know he looks like a Ken-Doll with half of its hair pulled out?” Well, not only does homie not know, he thinks you’re looking because he’s so hot. If you’ve never known someone who is truly deluded, look no further than Washington D.C..

When was the last time you saw a real person run for office? Off the top of my head I can think of just a couple of examples…. and if I’m not mistaken, none of them win. And if they do win, they are quickly pulled aside by the David Axelrods and Karl Roves of the world and told just where to squat and push. And if they can’t play ball, you say? Well then my guess is a photo of them in bed with a dead girl or live boy, or both, show up in the New York Times. And no, Anthony Weiner and Elliot Spitzer have not been set up, they’re just run-of-the-mill power mad sleazebags.

Let’s say you’re a blue collar guy or gal, you work hard, you pay your taxes, you try to follow most of the rules. Your Grandpa voted democrat, he was a good guy, so you do too. Besides, you’ve been told just how much these guys care about you….heck, they can really relate. Let’s take a look at a couple of these down to earth reps for the little guy ( and just hold on repubs, your paragraph comes next ). Let’s start with someone we all know, Nancy Pelosi. The Democrat Representative from California has a net worth of at least 24 Million Dollars. This includes a swanky California Vineyard that sells roughly half a million bucks worth of grapes every year. Yes, Nationalized Healthcare advocates, your champion could easily pay you and your family’s medical expenses forever off of the interest her dough makes. On to another stalwart of the little guy, or I should say gal, because everyone associates this next winner with Women’s Rights. It’s Senator Dianne Feinstein, Democrat from California, who is worth somewhere in the neighborhood of 41 Million dollars. And irony of ironies, her hubby is Dick Blum…. Prez and CEO of Blum Capital Partners LP, you know, one of those really evil private equity firms. Another prime example is of course the unflappable Senator Jay Rockefeller of West Virginia. He’s sliding into home this year with a net worth of about 83 Million. I’ve been to West Virginia, and I’m pretty sure that’s more Cheese than everyone else in the state put together. And here’s the really funny part. Most of that cheddar comes from family oil money. I’d be laughing if I could afford it.

But hold on there you so called “conservatives”….. I have a couple of examples for you too. You’ve seen alot of this guy on CSPAN lately, and he’s all vim, vigor and hair dye. It’s Darrell Issa, Republican Senator from California. He’s rollin’ Oprah style with at least 350 Million under the mattress. Hey, I thought California was broke? I’m sure out of good conscience all of these Statesmen and Women from Cali are stuffing their tax forms full of extra cash to help out the common peeps who pay the huge taxes levied on them in the Promised Land. Don’t hold your breath California, even though it would help the environment ’cause your exhale is now considered a pollutant, halitosis or no. Next stop, Senator Bob Corker, Republican from Tennessee. This good ‘ole boy from the Volunteer State is worth at least 16 million. I know people from Tennessee, and I’m pretty sure his bank account does not represent the average citizen of the state. Round it out with this year’s big loser, Rep. Michael McCaul, Republican from Texas. See, last year he was pulling about 300 million give or take, and he lost half of it. Now he’s only got 114 million to fall back on. Man, I bet there’s some sleepless nights at his estate wondering how he’s gonna keep the family fed. Guess it’s nothin’ but Hamburger Helper and Ramen Noodles for you, buddy. The only advantage the R’s have in this is at least they’re not on TV daily talking about how they can relate to the guy working the MickeyDee’s drivethru.

And let’s not forget the Executive Branch. Barry and Michelle are worth at least 11 million, respectively. For those under 25 enrolled in college, that’s about 22 million collectively. Just for kicks I wanted to work in John Kerry and his wife, Teresa, only because he’s getting by with about 194 million and she’s banking roughly 200 Million. Can you even imagine having that kind of money? And just why do any of these people actually work in government? Normal folks would probably take it easy after a ship like that comes in, but if your goal is true power, you know, the power to control all of us like pawns on a chessboard, you gotta keep goin’, man. Or maybe you are so deluded by your Party Affiliation that you just keep on defending your guy,’cause you think admitting that you’ve been suckered would be a huge blow to your ego. Or maybe, just maybe, you actually think they believe in what they’re selling. That they DO want to help you, that you do have an advocate in government. That they want “free” healthcare for you, or “clean” water and air. Or that they want you to be successful and prosperous, and to be able to achieve their level of wealth and power. If I just described you, then pardon me while I endlessly laugh and cry at the same time. Because not only do you have serious thinking problems, you are feeding the fleas and ticks that suck the lifeblood out of what was created by better men than we currently have in Washington.

Because no matter the Party, no matter the Cause, it’s a game to all of these Senators, Representatives, Presidents and Appointees. And you wanna know something? We don’t ever win. That’s why I prefer to think of it as a circus. A circus that has nothing but Clowns. The only problem I can see is…… There aren’t enough Clown Names.

( Thanks to CQ Roll Call and Celebrity Net Worth for my Net Worth figures )

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Oh No…… It’s Mr. Bill Oh’ Really!

Aside

  There’s a troubling trend I’ve been noticing in the last few days. Well… to be honest, it’s not new, and not that many are troubled by it. Maybe that’s what I find so irritating. I just watched a clip of “King Loofa”, otherwise known as Bill O’Reilly, once again pontificating on television while slathered in what looks like oompa-loompah make up.  His grand, arrogant oration to a member of the opposition to nationalized healthcare made me want to spit out my Kroger-brand coffee. 

  His (paraphrased)  point was this: ” Hey, you guys know you’re not going to win this de-fund Obamacare thing…. you know it’s a fight you can’t win…. so why are you fighting it? What’s wrong with you guys? You must be stupid or crazy or both.” Well why don’t we change Bill’s name to Bill Oh Really? I thought this nation was founded on the very notion that some fights are worth fighting. Even when it’s against all odds, even when everyone says it can’t be done. Defeat the most powerful empire on earth? Nah.. Create a republic of free men and women that takes the power from an Aristocracy and gives it to ordinary folks? Nah…. Impossible. So why try? 

  It brings to mind just a few examples of people who spit in the face of Bill Oh Really’s “wisdom”.  I’ve already mentioned the founding of our country, so let’s start there. Do you think that George Washington had confidence in his ability to defeat the armies of the British Crown?  Well I don’t think he did. In fact, if not for the outcome achieved, and with the exception of the Battle of Trenton, Washington kinda sucked at winning any engagement with the British.  His crowning achievement was probably not getting shot right out of his saddle every time he lined the Colonials up for the slaughter.  To me it seems that it surely must have been Providence that we came out on top of the struggle for Independence.

  Let’s make a stab at another individual that made the impossible possible.  Take a look around you wherever you are right now.  Are the lights on? Can you read at night without dripping wax all over you? Let’s forget the whole flourescent bulb fiasco for a second, as that’s the subject for another day.  Electric light has changed the world in a way that almost nothing else has.  Mankind finally did what was thought to be a pipe dream. Bring light to darkness, safety to lurking danger, with the flip of a switch.  Thomas Edison tried hundreds of time to invent the lightbulb. and I’m sure the Oh Really’s of the world told him, “hey, it’s not going to work, it’s a fight you can’t win…. so cut it out already will you?”.  Well I’m glad the Sultan of Shower Scrubbers wasn’t there to, pardon the pun, illuminate him on the futility of his endeavor. 

And finally, I wonder what Mr. Bill would say to Martin Luther King jr. and other civil rights activists of the sixties? Surely they were also told, “Hey…. what you’re doing is impossible. You’re just making a stink for something that you know will never happen.” I guess he’d line up with guys like Democrat Senator Strom Thurmond or Klan member Senator Robert Byrd, Democrat from West Virginia, who personally stood at the podium for over 14 hours to try to block the Civil Rights Act. Or guys like George Wallace, and yes he’s another Democrat , who stood in multiple schoolhouse doors to block innocent children from going to school.

I was under the impression that I was fortunately born somewhere where the impossible is made possible. I thought this was the Nation of Underdogs. I thought this was perhaps the only place on the face of the earth where if you could dream it, you could do it. Because sometimes you fight because it’s the right thing to do, no matter the odds, no matter the cost. History is made by men and women who looked poo-pooers like Bill O’ Reilly in the face and said, “Impossible, huh? We’ll see about that.”

Who Passed the Gas?

Ahhhh…… Here we go again. I have spent several days soaking up cable news and talk radio opinion much like a urinal cake soaks up unpleasant aromas. And just what topic could make me subject myself to such punishment, you ask? The IRS scandal? The NSA spying scandal? The blatant disregard of the Constitution that our (s)elected officials swore to uphold? The National Healthcare debacle? Booooring. That’s so last week. I have been watching, reading, and listening to the incessant beating of the war drums taking place in America by our Elites.  Who cares that almost all of us regular folks, that’s code for moron in Washington by the way,  want nothing to do with this. 

  Establishment types on both sides seem to be blaring the call to war  like those annoying weekly standard tests that mess up my CSI reruns.  How strange. I keep getting this weird feeling of deja vu….. I vaguely remember another middle eastern country with a “dictator” that was gassing his own people and threatening “instability in the region”. We needed to “form a coalition”, and “keep all options open” to stop the slaughter.
I don’t remember……. did that work out well? In the scheme of things, there was far more evidence of WMD use in Iraq than there is in Syria. The scary thing, actually it would be funny if not so frightening, is the same bobbleheads that predicted doom and failure in Iraq are calling for action in Syria. WTF? I thought the main source of trouble in the world was an Imperialist America that couldn’t mind it’s own business. In fact, I thought we elected the current political leadership based on an opposition to this kind of fiasco.
So here we are…. The president is on TV, red-faced and irritated with having to answer questions from a foreign press that isn’t in line for his autograph after his not-so-stellar golf round. I found it ironic, if not a little sad, that while meeting with the Swiss Prime Minister our Duffer in Chief decided to give a little lecture about military action in Syria. That’s class ladies and gentlemen, giving a war mongering temper tantrum while standing next to the leader of an officially neutral country.

I am appalled at the lack of outrage by our press, and also by the “Code Pink” groups of the world. We have ZERO evidence that Syria has used chemical weapons. You say, ” no way. man! The POTUS says we have intelligence that there are WMD’s!”…. Well, I can remember a different POTUS saying pretty much the same thing. So, that guy was wrong and needed to be condemned by history, but this guy is awesome, not to mention completely trustworthy, right? Good to know Obama is on track to earn the Nobel Peace Prize he received awhile back.
And where are the calls for caution in this rush to conflict? Nowhere, that’s where. You’ve good ‘ole John McShame calling for action. You would think a guy held in a cell for several years by an undeclared enemy would calm down a little bit before possibly sentencing scores of young Americans to the exact same fate. Speaker Boner now calls for the same. All that’s left is for that manliest of all senators, Lindsey Graham, to declare in a loud, lispy voice, ” Leths go to waaah!”. Watching these idiots let themselves be cornered by possibly the most incompetent executive to ever hold the office is mind blowing. Let me get this straight, the prez says “I’m making a red line you can’t cross!”, and when it’s allegedly crossed, suddenly it’s “our” red line, or Congress’ red line. I love how when Barry talks good news, it’s “me, me, me”, but when he steps in a pile its, “we, we, we”.

Here’s the real issue. We have been told for years that we cannot depend on nameless, vague “intelligence” that is used to commit our country to military action. Now, mired in serious scandal that at any other time in history, with any other party, would result in impeachment, our Administration finds it’s Grand Illusion. Or if you prefer, Grand Distraction. I want to see all the baby boomers, millennials, and peaceniks who have been squawking for so long, about so much, to stand up and say, “It was wrong for the previous administration to take us to war in another country, over incomplete information…..and it’s wrong now, regardless of politics”.

I won’t hold my breath……even though someone supposedly passed gas.